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“Aw, lighten up!”
“Just chill, man!”
“You’re always so serious!”
Have you ever been told any of these? When you hear it, does it really bake your noodle? It does for me. You see, I have a very intense personality, and I am proud of it.
I experience everything intensely. For me, there’s no lukewarm or in-between when it comes to feelings and senses.
Where most people experience life at maybe 70% of their feelings, I always run at well over 100%. It makes me intuitive, deeply connected, and also just a little bit “much” for most people.
Have you ever wondered if you have an intense personality? Let’s find out.
What Is an Intense Personality?
Most of us develop a mask in life, which shields our deeper feelings and emotions from others.
We’re conditioned as kids to tone things down and remain composed in life. But a high-intensity personality type is not able to contain their almost excessive feelings about things and people.
Intense people don’t hold back or mask their feelings. In fact, they ooze an almost fanatical passion about the things that interest them.
It can be really amazing to be with someone like that if you share their interests. Of course, when you are in conflict with them, it can be really challenging.
While that level of intensity can be overwhelming and uncomfortable for the people around them, an intense personality person is very comfortable with who they are.
They have no desire to tone things down or mellow out.
Most personality types are classified according to the Myers Briggs Type Inventory (MBTI), but being considered an intense personality applies to more than one of the personality types in the MBTI.
It’s like the cherry on the cake, and it can be great, or it can be just a little too much.
Some people see an intense personality as being strong-willed, but it’s more than that. As an intense personality, you desire nothing more than to live and experience life in the full.
You can think of it as operating in HD quality picture versus most people who are content living in AVI picture quality.
Usually, people choose the easy path, but a very intense person wants the difficult path. They want to live life by struggling through challenges. It gives meaning to their existence to experience drama, difficulty, and challenge.
You may think they are putting it on, or overdramatizing, but these people feel, experience, and see life in high color, and it can become a near sensory overload for them.
Pros and Cons of Intense Personality Types
Living life on supercharge can be amazing, but it can also be draining. It has its pros and cons, and before you decide whether you have an intense personality, consider the ups and downs of running at that level in life.
Pros of Being an Intense Person
Being intense all the time means you:
- Have a craving for new experiences and people
- Experience every situation in absolute extremes, which can make for great sensory enjoyment
- Are extremely passionate about things and people who interest you
- Are 100% supportive of people you care about
- Are highly motivated to succeed
- Easily empathize with others
- Dedicate yourself to your relationships, which makes you a great partner
Cons of Being an Intense Person
On the downside, being intense means you:
- Easily get depressed when things go badly
- Can become overwhelmed and hurt by people and situations, which can lead to an inability to handle things or even express what you’re feeling
- Overreact when you can’t cope with something
- Break down when small things happen, because to you, they’re not small
15 Signs of an Intense Personality
Here are the signs of an intense personality:
1. You Are Passionate
Because of your intense perception of life and events, you are very passionate about things that matter to you. Hint: Basically everything matters to you.
Being so passionate means you are quick to open up to others, bubbly by nature, and very excited about new developments. In a way, you’re like a kid at Christmas when things change or new things happen.
Because of that passion, you make a great employee, but you can also stir up drama when things don’t go your way.
As a whole, your passion is contagious, and you motivate colleagues and family. You are hardworking, dedicated, and driven to succeed because you burn with a passion that you must follow – there’s no other choice for you.
2. A Great Capacity for Emotional Insight
Since extreme personalities feel so deeply, they are naturally empathic. If you are an intense person, you will quickly pick up on what people around you feel. You may even amplify that feeling and mirror it.
While it’s great to sense people’s deepest feelings, it can be challenging too, as you won’t always know whether what you are feeling is yours or that of those around you.
Your inner emotion filter functions 100 times more intensely than everyone else’s. So when you watch a sad movie, you will feel sorrow much more than other viewers do. Far from being hysterical, you just process feelings at a much deeper level.
3. Wild Display of Anger
Most people go through life with some ability to conceal their “negative” feelings. They hide anger, but when you are intense, you may suddenly release all your pent-up feelings.
Anger is usually somewhat reserved, but with you, anger slips out like a rabid dog, and before you know it, you’re totally enraged.
People may call it an overreaction, but you simply express anger how you know best – all out. When that anger has passed, you may feel somewhat confused and embarrassed. But at that moment, the anger felt so real, you couldn’t help releasing it.
4. Relationships Become Clingy
Not only do you share a lot about yourself very quickly, but when you like someone, that “like” quickly turns to love. In relationships, you can easily become clingy. You have already emotionally invested in the person you are with.
Affection means you don’t want to lose them, so you begin to hold on tightly to that relationship. If they pull away, you don’t take it well, and you try to hold on tighter. This affection can become cloying, and you may be seen as clingy.
You are deeply passionate about everything you care for, so if you like or love someone, you will walk through fire for them, and you’re not letting them go. Should that person intentionally hurt you, it’s likely your love and affection will turn bitter – to the extreme.
5. Intense Staring
Intense people tend to make eye contact a lot. When they look at you, there’s no mistaking it.
It’s a kind of stare that cuts through rooms, people, and distraction. When someone who has an intense personality looks at you, there’s no mistaking that they’ve taken an interest in you.
If you make eye contact, they won’t be the one to break it.
When an intense person looks at you, it may feel as if they look right into you. It’s like they can see all of you – your past, future, and dreams – with a single glance.
Partly, this is because they are so intuitive and passionate, but it’s also the highly observant way they look at you.
On the upside, it can feel like you are really seen when you face such an intense look. It can also be very disconcerting and unnerving to have a total stranger look at you like that.
6. You Love Meaningful Conversations
If you yawn and lose interest when people talk about silly stuff like bargains and the weather, it could mean you are an intense person. You crave mental stimulation, so deep and meaningful conversations are what fire your passions.
Topics like the afterlife, enlightenment, personalities, attachment, and personal satisfaction get your heart beating just a little faster.
You love diving deep and really discussing what you think about something with an intellectual equal. Quotes, meditations, and unique religions are fascinating to you.
When you really get excited about a conversation, time has no meaning. You could debate and dive deep into nuanced meanings and ideas without even noticing that you are going to be late or have to be somewhere.
7. Verbally Expressive and Colorful
Where people may “beat around the bush,” you don’t. You are direct, eloquent, and assertive.
If you have a point to make, you will make it without worrying about what people may think. You cut through social niceties, aiming straight for the message you want to share.
You tend to stir conversations toward deep topics that may make people uncomfortable, as you don’t like light conversation.
While you don’t necessarily speak with the same mind-blowing eloquence of Raymond Reddington in The Blacklist, you hold your own and speak intensely and with passion about topics that interest you.
8. You Spend a Lot of Time in Your Mind
Since the world doesn’t really get you, the safest place for you is in your mind.
You read extensively, and you listen to music that resonates with you, which means your inner landscape is populated with intense people (fictional), adventures, and deep conversations.
To build on this inner escape world, you learn lots, and you are constantly building your experiences and knowledge base.
Your inner dialog is complemented by the richness of that imaginary world, which meets your needs when you don’t have a physical partner whom you can turn to for mental and emotional stimulation.
9. Misunderstood Mood Swings
People may call you moody, but the sudden shifts in emotional equilibrium are often misunderstood. You don’t do incremental changes as you feel so much more intensely than others do.
They may see you as a loud and quick to anger person, but the reality is that your emotions idle at Ferrari speed, while everyone else’s is putting along at “Driving Miss Daisy” speed.
You need time, space, and preparation to handle changes, and when you feel confronted, you’re much more likely to react intensely. With your excitable nature, you may “blow over the top” when people least expect it.
It’s not a sign that you’re crazy or an emotional wreck – you’re just in a different league.
10. High IQ
With such broad interests and extreme passion for everything you do, is it any wonder that your mental skills exceed the average Joe or Jane? Yip, you have a higher-than-average IQ.
Sadly, this increased intelligence means you are often not satisfied with social exchanges. You are filled to bursting with knowledge, and you probably don’t have anyone whom you can share it with.
Of course, when you find someone who you feel comfortable sharing with, you hold onto them for dear life (#clingy).
The higher state of mental arousal your brain experiences also means you ingest information much deeper and with greater speed than others do.
As a result, you’re exceptional at problem-solving, and you have a higher functioning reasoning faculty than most.
11. Incredible Focus
The mental acuity and passion for things that interest you combine to produce a serious level of focus and determination.
The harder a task is, the deeper your focus becomes, and you can tap into all your accumulated mental resources to help you master any challenge.
You are dedicated, and no matter what you are busy with, you always achieve the best possible outcome, thanks to your focus.
Your higher than normal IQ, depth of emotional processing, and the way you can puzzle through challenges in your mind make you a highly focused and intense personality.
12. You Avoid Making Assumptions
While you may be quick to have emotional reactions, you don’t like assumptions. You never want to assume something about a person. If someone acts ignorantly, you become outraged.
You know that knowledge is power, and you believe that people should educate themselves before venturing ignorant opinions that are based on misinformed assumptions.
13. “The Truth Is Out There”
While you’re no Fox Mulder, you believe that truth is important and we should seek it. No matter what the situation, you will always act truthfully, even if that hurts people.
When there’s an argument to be made, you’ll always find faulty reasoning and point that out. Because you seek the truth, you are willing to suffer punishment, discomfort, and painful growth as nothing else will track with your intense personality.
14. You’re a Hopeless Romantic
It may seem contradictory, since you’re so driven by truth, have mood swings, and fixate on things, but you’re a romantic. You absolutely believe in romance and a happily ever after.
Your passion translates into your love life, and you seek a deep connection in relationships. Therefore, you’d rather trade bland contentment for passionate commitment that may be spiced with arguments and conflict.
15. Living up to Higher Standards
When you live life with passion, dedication, focus, a high IQ, excellent verbal skills, and an intensity that makes others feel awkward, it’s clear you hold yourself to higher standards. You don’t believe in cruising through life, and you won’t accept it from others.
Far from being a perfectionist, you set boundaries, enforce them, and you know exactly what you want and won’t tolerate. You strive to maximize your potential, and you believe others should do so, too.
Final Thoughts on an Intense Personality
Being an intense personality type is never a bad thing, provided you can balance the intense emotional processing, empathy, focus, mood swings, and high IQ with great socialization skills, a pinch of patience, and a lot of forgiveness (for yourself and others).
Keeping track of your mental processes and feelings with journaling activities can help you figure out where you need to work on yourself.
Try this 111 self-reflection journaling challenge to help kickstart a greater awareness of yourself and the people around you.
And if you're looking for more articles about personality types, be sure to check out these blog posts:
- 25 Signs & Characteristics of a Sigma Male
- 13 Things to Be Passionate About in Your Life
- 17 Common Beta Male Traits and Characteristics
- 101 Neutral Personality Traits Most Common in People
Finally, if you want to identify YOUR personality type, then take one of these 11 personality tests to better understand what makes you tick.
