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Whether you’ve bought a new car, closed on a house, or taken your dream vacation… it’s fun to share those experiences with your friends. I mean, you’re happy and excited, and it shows!
When your friends come alongside you and are genuinely interested and happy for you, it increases your own feelings of happiness in the retelling of the events.
Conversely, when your friends respond with a sarcastic response like “must be nice,” it can quickly deflate your warm feelings.
Wouldn’t you agree that having a positive response to sarcasm would be helpful when people say must be nice? We’ve put together 5 scenarios with appropriate responses that you can use to keep your happiness intact.
5 Responses for When People Say “Must Be Nice”
Response #1. A Promotion
You just became the youngest vice president in the company. You’ll begin your new position next week. Your coworkers decide to take you to lunch as “one of them” for the last time. You’re touched that they want to celebrate with you.
You’ve enjoyed collaborating with this crew, and while you’ll still see them occasionally, you know things are about to change as you climb the company ladder.
At lunch, you share how you’ve enjoyed working with them, how grateful you are, and how excited you are about your new position.
One of your coworkers mutters, “Must be nice.” You’re a little taken aback. Then you realize that there may be some resentment because both of you have been intent on moving up since you joined the company.
You decide to ignore the cynical remark. After all, you don’t want to embarrass your coworker and prefer to keep your working relationship intact.
Your Response: “Yes, it is. And I so appreciate you all coming out today to help celebrate.”
Response #2. Taking a Dream Vacation
For 3 years, you’ve been saving up to take your family on your dream vacation. Finally, you were able to pull it off. You had a great time; your spouse had a great time. And the kids can’t stop talking about all the fun they had!
You all were living in the moment! You’re still flying high from the entire experience, and you’ve decided that you’ll start saving for the next trip right away.
You’re having dinner with a group of friends you haven’t seen in a few months, and everyone is catching up on what’s been happening in their lives.
When you share your recent vacation, a friend says, “Must be nice.” For a fleeting moment, you feel almost guilty for the week you and your family just enjoyed.
Then you realize that everyone has different circumstances, and while you’re not sure why your friend chose a negative response, you can respond in a positive way.
Your Response: “Yes, my family deserved this. It’s been a long time coming.”
Response #3. “We’re pregnant!”
You and your partner have just found out you’re pregnant! It’s excellent news, especially since you’ve wanted a baby for several years. You can’t wait to share the news with your friends and family.
But first, you decide you want to share it with that super special person in your life: your best friend.
You invite her to coffee, and as you’re enjoying the moments with your freshly brewed cup of Joe and the presence of your BFF, you take a deep breath and spill the beans. You notice, rather than happiness and enthusiasm, she blurts out, “Must be nice.”
You chalk up her cynicism to the fact that she has three kids, and while this is your first, she’s probably just not as excited as she would have been looking forward to her first.
Whatever you do, you’ve determined that no one is going to steal your joy about your little bundle of joy. Plus, this allows you to help up your friend’s mood.
Your Response: “Yes, we’ve been blessed, and I’m so glad to be able to share the good news with you first.”
Response #4. Earning a Degree
You’ve studied hard, taken classes after work, and stayed up late to make the grades and achieve a lifetime goal. Finally, the day has come when you’ve received your degree! Your hard work has paid off.
Not only that, but you are the first generation in your family to earn a college degree. You can’t wait to tell your dad. You anticipate he’ll be so proud. With your sheepskin in hand, you stop by for a visit.
When you show him the fruits of your labors, your dad says, “Must be nice.” You realize your dad may wish he had been the first in the family to graduate.
You decide to respond in such a way that will keep your happiness intact about graduating and give him the gift of your gratitude.
Your Response: “Yes, it’s taken a lot of hard work but it's so worth it, and I appreciate your support.”
Response #5. Sharing a Good Experience
Your friend has just returned home after spending two weeks with relatives. She complains about how messy her house is and how she could really use some cleaning and organizing.
You, wanting to be helpful, share your own experience with hiring professional cleaning services. You tell her what a great job they did and how your house has never been so bright and shiny.
You share how hiring them freed up your time to focus on other things. As you take a breath before singing more of the cleaning services’ praises, she chimes in with, “Must be nice.” The tone of her voice tells you the statement was made out of jealous feelings.
Your Response: “Yes, and that’s why I’m sharing it with you, because you can do this, too!”
Final Thoughts on Responses to “Must Be Nice”
When people say must be nice, it’s never spoken with the intent of lifting you up. Often, it extends from jealousy… and whether intentional or not, that phrase may bring you down to the responder’s emotional level.
It’s hurtful when someone that you want to share your success with makes you feel bad for that success. Then, you feel like you have to qualify or explain the joy you felt. That can make for a really awkward situation.
Knowing how to respond best will keep your level of happiness intact and may elevate others in your presence. When you’re wondering how to respond when people say must be nice, always lead with “yes.”
You’ll turn that situation right around in your own emotional state and may lighten the mood of others, too.