11 Rules for Forming a Friendship with an INFJ Personality Type

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Friendship is important. It's the glue that holds us together when things get tough and the celebration that makes life worth living. We all need friends to support us, lift us up, and help us through life's challenges.

I've been able to rely on friendships for moral support throughout a variety of life’s challenges. When I suffered the death of loved ones or was coping with school and job stress.

Online chats with real friends helped pull me and others through the isolating time of the pandemic. There is nothing like having a good friend to help with emotional support when dealing with romantic relationships. 

The thing about friends is that they don't always have to be the same as us in order to work out. Some of our best friendships may be completely different from us in terms of personality and interests.

Having diverse friendships can give us a greater perspective on life and make our days way more interesting. Whether you and your friends share different political ideas, social activities, musical taste, etc., having diversity in friends can introduce us to new things and help us grow as a person.

It can also be a huge confidence boost when people who you may be completely different from see something in you that is worthy of a friendship. 

Thanks to diverse friends, I have discovered the beautiful voice of Andrea Bocelli, thought provoking books and visited countries I would not have otherwise thought about thanks to their recommendation.

However, some personalities may have a hard time finding friends that share their same interests or understand their unique perspective. This situation can be especially difficult if you have an INFJ personality type.

What Is INFJ Personality?

INFJ stands for Introverted, iNtuitive, Feeling and Judging. People with this personality type are often seen as quiet, introspective, and analytical. They like to spend time alone or in small groups, and they prefer to communicate through written or spoken words rather than actions. 

However, they can communicate very well when they are around people they are comfortable with. Despite their initial introversion, INFJ people can be great peacemakers since they focus on harmony.

These introverted personalities can also be very creative and often great visionaries. They truly value their friendships and take their relationships with people seriously. It is one of the 16 personalities of the Myers Briggs categories and is the rarest one of all.

If you're struggling to find friends who understand your INFJ personality type, don't worry! There are plenty of people out there who share your perspective – you just have to find them. 

Anyone who is friends with an INFJ type may quickly realize their friend is quite unique compared to others but may struggle to always understand them. 

If you don't always get your INFJ buddy, just think of the benefits of having such a rare personality in your life.

Benefits of Being Friends with INFJ People

 There are some amazing benefits to forging relationship with INFJ’s. These include:

  • They are supportive 
  • They are very empathetic 
  • They will listen to you 
  • They will inspire and motivate you
  • If you are a real friend, they will prioritize you
  • They will be your biggest fan
  • They are devoted friends
  • They avoid conflict and are often peacemakers 

11 Tips for Being Friends With INFJ

Here are a few tips for forming friendships with other INFJs that you may find extremely useful.

1. Seek Out Small and Intimate Gatherings

INFJs often feel more comfortable in small groups or one-on-one interactions. Even if you are a social butterfly who loves bringing friends everywhere, your INFJ pal will thrive in and prefer small social events or meetups.

A coffee shop meetup would be great compared to a massive party with hundreds of people the INFJ does not know.

Smaller gatherings will give them the opportunity to get to know people in a low-pressure setting. It can give them time to get around to different individuals for the real and deep conversations they prefer.

2. Find Common Ground

When meeting new people, try to find things that you have in common. This can be anything from shared interests to similar life experiences. Having something in common will help you form a bond with someone more easily.

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INFJs are attracted to people who are genuine and authentic. So, the best way to make friends with an INFJ is to simply be yourself.

This is especially true when you associate with the INFJ individual. Remember these personality types prefer more deep interactions and conversations with people. Whatever common ground you have with INFJ, try to nurture it as much as possible.

For example, if you both love books, consider inviting your INFJ friend to book conventions or author book signings. If you see a book you think they might like, don't hesitate to buy one as a gift. Your INFJ friend will normally be touched by such meaningful gifts instead of something superficial that doesn't suit them.

3. Be Patient

INFJs can be slow to warm up to new people and situations. If you're meeting someone for the first time, don't expect them to open up right away. Give them time to adjust and get comfortable with you.

While it may take a few interactions for the INFJ to fully open up to you, once they do, you know you have someone who trusts you.

4. Respect Their Need for Alone Time

INFJs often need time to recharge after social interactions. If your friend seems like they need some space, respect their wishes and give them some time alone. They'll appreciate it, and you'll get to spend time with them when they're feeling more energized. 

Whatever you do, don't try to push them to socialize, as you are disrespecting their space.

5. Ask Questions

INFJs are often deep thinkers who enjoy talking about their thoughts and feelings. If you want to get to know your INFJ friends better, ask them questions about themselves and their opinions on various topics. They'll be happy to share their thoughts with you.

Pick their brain for hours and enjoy how the conversation flows when they talk about interesting topics. 

6. Be Supportive

INFJs often need a little extra support and understanding. If your friend is going through a tough time, be there for them. Listen to them, offer advice if they want it, and just be a shoulder to cry on if they need it.

7. Offer Help

INFJs are sometimes hesitant to ask for help, but they'll appreciate it if you offer. If you see your friend struggling with something, offer to help them out. They'll be grateful, and you'll get the chance to bond over the experience.

Bonding with an INFJ will further deepen your friendship. Helping them out will show you truly care, and they will certainly return the love in the friendship.

8. Be Respectful

INJFs are often very private people, and they may not want to share everything about themselves with you right away. Be respectful of their boundaries and don't push them to share more than they're comfortable with. 

As mentioned before, this personality type may need to warm up over time but are loyal once they see you as a friend. If they view you as disrespectful of their space, the friendship probably won't prosper.

9. Don't Take Things Personally

INJFs can sometimes come across as cold or insensitive. This is usually not the case, and it's important not to take things personally.

If your friend says or does something that hurts your feelings, talk to them about it. They'll likely be happy to apologize and try to do better in the future.

10. Appreciate Their Uniqueness

INFJs are often very unique individuals, and their quirks are part of what makes them special. Don't try to change your friend – just appreciate them for who they are. 

Having such a unique friend in your life will provide you with creative inspiration and support that may surprise you.

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Smaller gatherings will give them the opportunity to get to know people in a low-pressure setting.

Since these types are unique and think out of the box, they are the perfect people to have around when you want encouragement for a grand idea or life change.

In a situation others may think is crazy, the INFJ will be the one to help inspire you and plan a course of action.

11. Be Yourself 

INFJs are attracted to people who are genuine and authentic. So, the best way to make friends with an INFJ is to simply be yourself. They'll appreciate your honesty and sincerity, and you'll have a much better chance of forming a lasting friendship.

But Can INFJs Be Friends with Other INFJs?

Of course, INFJs can be friends with others who are the same personality type. However, the occurrence is very rare. 

The INFJ personality type is the rarest of them all. So, the likelihood of encountering another INFJ is much lower than other personality types. 

However, if two INFJs were to meet and form a bond, of course, it would probably happen over time and most interaction may end up having to take place online due to their introversion. As the two open up, they can certainly bond over their need for deep conversation and creative sensibilities.

Final Thoughts About INFJ Friendship

Forming friendships with INFJs can be a challenge, but it's worth it. These relationships are formed over time with patience, close interactions and deep discussions.

When you make friends with an INFJ, consider yourself lucky. Your friends are a very rare personality type that is very creative, loyal, dedicated and can bring so much to your life.

When you are ready to start a groundbreaking business late-in-life, move to a foreign country alone, apply to become an astronaut at NASA, having an INFJ friend on hand will give you the push you need. 

By following these tips, you'll be well on your way to forming and maintaining strong, lasting friendships with INFJs.  Good for you!

Finally, if you want to identify YOUR personality type, then take one of these 11 personality tests to better understand what makes you tick.

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