The Relationship of Procrastination With a Mastery Goal Versus an Avoidance Goal

Goals can be classified into many different dimensions. One of the most popular models is the 2×2, approach vs. avoidance vs. mastery vs. performance model:   Approach Avoidance Mastery Mastery-Approach Mastery-Avoidance Performance Performance-Approach Performance-Avoidance   To better understand what each of these dimensions mean, you can read this page on goal setting or this study which … Read more

Performance and Learning Goals for Emotion Regulation

In an attempt to feel better after experiencing negative emotion, different people use different strategies. Some talk about their problems with others, other try to distract themselves from thinking those negative thoughts, others try to find something positive from the experience. There are two strategies which people can use on their own, without help from … Read more

Child Achievement and Problem-Solving: Two Experimental Studies

What goal types are most effective for encouraging performance and happiness in children? In this study, two personality variables and three experimental conditions were investigated. Those with a high motive to achieve success performed better and reported higher satisfaction and happiness than those with a high motive to avoid failure. In addition, those with a … Read more

Goal Setting

[Properly set] goals have been shown to increase performance on well over 100 different tasks involving more than 40,000 participants in at least eight countries working in laboratory, simulation, and field settings. The dependent variables have included quantity, quality, time spent, costs, job behavior measures, and more. The time spans have ranged from 1 minute … Read more

Recognizing the Right type of Gratitude

This is a guest post from Ciara Conlon, one of Ireland’s best productivity and well-being bloggers. What are you grateful for today? How often do you stop to give thanks for all the gifts you have been given? Recently I met a friend for coffee who described to me the changes she’d been experiencing in … Read more

Time or Money? Lessons Learned from Sleeping with a Stranger

I just got back from a ten week journey through India. It started out as a two week sightseeing trip with the family, but my mother country had different plans for me.

It was day two, and we had just gotten back from viewing the sights of Delhi – an ancient fort, a modern bazaar, a few beautiful temples. We were all exhausted, so we went straight to bed.

But a few hours later, I woke for a midnight dalliance. I was driven by a compulsion.

I just had to go to the freaking bathroom.

It was a romance that grew only stronger with time – what was supposed to be just a once-off encounter became an unbreakable habit. It started with food poisoning, but turned into something more – cough, cold, sore throat, and finally, fever.

In between I also managed to visit the Taj Mahal, ride an elephant, and a bunch of other fun touristy stuff. Which was all nice, but not the reason I decided to say back an extra two months.

No, it wasn't because I was trying to lose weight, although food poisoning can do wonders for the waistline. It was because I had encountered a philosophy of life which bewildered me, and because I'd spent half of my time sightseeing and the other half sick, I'd had little time left over for the real cultural experience – mingling with the locals.

It was my first trip to India since I was a baby – my parents left in their twenties, and for 22 years didn't go back. Now as an adult, I understand why my parents kept me away for so long, and why they tried to convince me not to extend my trip – just like I try to escape the materialism of my culture, my parents tried to escape the ‘laziness' of theirs.

But I had been intrigued, so I stayed an extra two months.

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Money Secret #4 – Delight Is In The Details

The last time I was on a date, things got awkward.

In itself, nothing new – on my best behavior, I'm unique. Loosened up by alcohol, I turn a bit weird.

It started off normal. Following my own advice, we were eating at the highest rated Italian restaurant in New York City.

I hadn't had a single expensive meal since quitting my eat-caviar-for-free consulting job. So I ordered an orgasm-in-your-mouth quality steak.

No surprise, it was so good that I wanted to savor the experience. Several times that evening I closed my eyes, stopped paying attention to the sounds around me, and focused exclusively on my sense of taste – on the complex, absolutely delicious waves of flavor washing over my tongue. My mouth may have curled into a creepy smile.

I tried explaining what I was doing – that it wasn't because she was boring that my eyes were closing. I don't know if she believed me, but whatever. It was worth it.

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There’s More to Life Than Happiness – But Wanting It is not Stupid or Selfish

The year is 2150. By some miracle, you're still alive. The Happiness Machine has finally been invented.

At a cost of just $100, you can get one for yourself. It's like a non-stop dose of heroine, ecstasy and marijuana combined, but without any of the negative side-effects – no brain damage, no poisoning, no psychological impairment. Best of all, there's no dependence.

The Happiness Machine feels just as good on day 200 as it did on day 1, inducing a permanent state of euphoria. The only drawback is that once you've plugged yourself in, there's no going back – the euphoria is permanent.

Would you use it?

There's a point in my life when I might have answered yes. I've spent many of the past 10 years of my life not happy – the thought of the few and far between moments of happiness becoming permanent would have been alluring. But even when depressed, I don't think I would have used the Happiness Machine.

Because there's more to life than happiness.

There's making a difference, accomplishing things, leaving a legacy, having a family.

That was the core message of a recent, popular article by the Atlantic: There's More to Life Than Being Happy.

I half-way agree – the pursuit of more happiness is only one of many important life goals.

But this article really pissed me off.

Scattered throughout the article are pieces of poisonous, toxic waste. They read like harmless ideas, but represent gross misrepresentations.

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